WARNING
STRONG LANGUAGE AHEAD

​So now the Catholic Church has its panties all in a bunch due to Obamacare’s making mandatory the coverage of contraceptive care. Why? Because they feel it infringes on their First Amendment Right of Freedom of Religion. Interesting argument there, considering how often this same group infringes on numerous rights of those it deems wrong. 

In the 1950s, the Knights of Columbus (perfect name, eh?) where huge proponents of adding Under God to the American Pledge of Allegiance. Yes, believe it or not, those two words were never intended to be spoken with hand over heart. Yet it is. But aren’t we not suppose to be a Christian country? Only one Monotheist faith (Christian), to my knowledge, calls their god God. Oh, you can just not say it. Really? Well how about you can just not use the pill? Seems the argument only works in one direction.  Freedom of Religion only applies to a corporation based in the Vatican, I guess.

The Church has a wonderful history of burning, banning and denouncing books. And not just Beelzebub’s Wildest Adventures, either. They got all huffy over Harry Potter. Why? Because of the evil, of course. Because a child did magic and adults were baddies. Evil. Don’t you see? It’s so obvious. 

Pornography is out. Especially the kind with the man in the man. It’s ruining this country, and not just because powerful religious folk have a moral abhorrence to the dirty, cum covered pictures.  There’s a whole slew of reasons why its bad. So says Rick Santorum. Who,m by the way, do not believe you should be free to fuck whomever you please. Just because two adults consent to enjoy each other’s flesh does not make it right. Outlaw it. Now! Save your gay souls!

Those gays can’t be marrying, either. Remember Prop 8? Remember how churches were screaming about homosexuals should never be allowed to marry? It’ll ruin the sanctity! Please ignore Rush Limbaugh behind us getting married for the fourth time. Dang you poo pushers! Y’all are trying to take something beautiful and sacred and prone to fifty-percent failure and turn it into something that everyone can enjoy. 

Those whores who want abortions? Rape them with the shame wand and make them wait a day before coming back to finish their vile act. They need to be taught the weight of their decision. Cause Lord knows a woman had no clue what it means to abort a fetus. They’re idiots and slutty and can only think with their cunts. So let’s begin stripping them of their rights. That will make this country perfect, in an extremist way. And when you’re done with her, fuck her boy. It’s okay, it’ll be covered up and you’ll be moved to a new parish where none of the little boys have ever been raped before. And if we must, we’ll do what we used to do and castrate the little fuck rags. 

Okay, that last part made me throw up a little in my mouth. Excuse me…

All right, back now. 

Its almost like they want the Taliban here, but with Jesus instead of Mohammad. And this is my issue with religion and its followers who chose to push their Bible into Washington. Keep your faith out of my laws. I don’t follow your church doctrine. Many American citizens don’t, in fact. This is a free country where certain freedoms are guaranteed. So stop trying to take them away! Stop trying to oppress people who share different views than you!

Now, I’ve been reading quite a bit about the Church’s issues with the healthcare reform. Basically, their whining about how their being fucked over and pushed down (kind of like what they’ve been doing to everyone else for centuries) and demand their rights be protected. As far as I can see, their rights are still safe and secure. Its everyone else’s who’re fucked. Scroll up. Remember those paragraphs? 

Unless we want to end up like Afghanistan post-USSR, we need to take a stand now. Keep God away from capitol hill. He’s not everyone’s so he shouldn’t be the inspiration for everyone’s laws. Logic and reason and intelligence should be leading this country, not faith in a man on a cross. You want to lead your life according to the Good Book? Fine. But don’t try to make all of us live that way.

The Catholic God who wants everyone to love everyone. What part of love means fuck them out of every right and dignity you can find. Oh, and rape little boys, too.

Will is an author and artist and producer (it’s only one indie short film but it’s on IMDB.com so it totes counts!) and founder of fetchentertainment.com and pain in the ass. He rather opinionated and has no problem sharing his thoughts on a variety of topics from the freakshow that was Election 2016 (how tf did Trump freaking win!?) to the importance of matching that belt to those shoes. He adores penguins and has a maniacal plan to use an army of them to take over the world and crown himself Emperor of All That Is (though he’d be happy with the Winter Russian Palace in what he would rename Mine!-Mine!-Mine!) but until then enjoys hiding away in his apartment and writing all sorts of tales that would worry that cokehead Sigmund Freud (really, we should believe he snorted for science!?) and drawing pictures of his creations.

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