Who here is a fan of Michael Myers? You know, the white mask killer who stalks babysitters? I am; he's my second favorite psycho after Freddy Kruger - nobody slays 'em like Fred - but there's something that's annoyed me for a while now... So, because I love to rant, I'm gonna rant about him and his series and that time he tried killing himself (metaphorically speaking, of course).
I still remember the spine tingles Halloween caused me as Michael, the silent, and rather efficient, killer stalked poor, sweet Lauri Strode and her (naughty) best friends. Horror movies don't get much of a reaction out of me anymore but watching Jamie Lee Curtis struggle to get away from the masked psycho made me clench my little fists as I hoped she'd survive the ordeal. And then again when I watched Halloween II right after. Oh, it was such fun; terrifying, stomach turning fun.
The came Halloween III: Season of the Witch. What the blood soaked hell was that? Any early attempt at going meta? Watch the origonal Halloween starring Jamie Lee Curtis played in the background during a bar scene. My thoughts: so, not only is Michael not in it, you're reminding me he's not in it? Ew. Gawd, that movie sucked. I still haven't forgiven them for it.
So sad they were so greedy that they'd up and betray their fans like that. Jerks.
Then came Halloween 4: The Return of Michael Myers and thus began as the best multi-part story line in horror; Micheal, no longer chasing after his sister after her "death" in a car accident, now has his sights set on his niece, Jamie. We got more blood, more screams, more death to enjoy as he slashed his way through Haddonfield. And we got two of them (Halloween 5: The Revenge of Michael Myers followed soon after) before they switched gears (and Jamie actresses) for a strange (and disappointing) trip down mystical lane. Um, why are you trying to explain his evil? Back when he was just a little boy stabbing his half naked sister to death, the scariest part was his being a little boy with no reasoning (where Rob Zombie royally screwed the pooch, by the way). And to make it magical? Aww, hell no. But, that wasn't the worst of it. Dear Lawd, how I wish it was.
No, the worst came with what should have been a brilliant, amazing, euphoric experience: the long awaited return of Jamie Lee Curtis. The original scream queen was back. Ooh, goosebumps! Turns out, she only faked her death to get away and (somehow) keep her daughter way from Uncle Knifey. Okay, so the logic is a little fuzzy but that's why its called creative writing. I mean, any writer worth their ink can figure something out. Unless....
Unless her son (why not her grandson?) just had to be seventeen (oh, that's why) 'cause she was seventeen the Night He Came Home - which, suddenly, was now the only night he came home. Um, say what? In a slap to the face of fans everywhere, parts 4, 5 and 6 were simply erased, ignored. Retconned.
Jesus on a fudge stick. Why?
Laziness. Pure and frikkin simple. They could have easily made it all cannon (except III cause... duh) and not ignored all the fun since then. But. Why? So because of no respect for their own series, H2O: Halloween Twenty Years Later was tainted. Having Jamie Lee back in action was still oh-gawd-amazeballs but it's disconnect from so much of the series kind of diluted the happy.
And don't get me started on Halloween: Resurrection. I know it was JLC's request but DAMN, that gave me such a sad that even if the rest of the film didn't suck donkey balls, I'd still have hated it.
It's funny how far a series can fall - especially when it's the own series' handlers that make it go crash pow boom. They went so bad, Rob Zombie, who has made nothing but crap (except the Halloween reboots; they've grown on me, especially II's ending -may the new III pick up from there even though it won't), have a try. Talk about desperate. When Halloween began, it was a small budget indie film and through word of mouth (totes deserved, fyi) it ballooned into the mutli-million dollar franchise it is today. Unfortunately, alone the way it hit a few self-laid speed bumps. I haven't given up hope in it yet but if I see another stupid lazy move on the part of anyone involved in this series, I'm done.
Don't fail your fans again.